life lessons – Running Erins

Attending a Bridal Shower: What You Should Know

Erin — Wed, 08 Aug 2018 09:00:24 +0000

Until recently, I had never attended a bridal shower. Sure I’ve been to weddings and baby showers but never a bridal shower. And little did I know I was NOT prepared! There were a few things that I didn’t consider until days before which left me rushing. After talking to a few friends, I realized how many of us had yet to attend one. So here’s what I learned from my experience:

What to Wear

It’s a no brainer that you should ALWAYS follow the dress code when one is provided. The hostess of the bridal shower I attended made it simple by requesting floral dress. But what happens when one isn’t provided? First, consider the setting. Will the event be inside or outside? Was the invitation semi-formal or informal? In any situation, a casual dress in a pastel color is a great choice. If ever in doubt just simply ask the hostess!

What to Gift

Now here is where things got tricky for me. Originally, I decided to gift the bride an item from the wedding registry as it was listed on the bridal shower invitation. But after talking to my mom and a few other women, I was told the bridal shower gift should specifically be for the bride. Makes sense right? Well pulling something together at the last minute is a headache. I ended up getting a personalized set of Mr. & Mrs. stemless wine glasses from Things Remembered. Then I threw in a few spa time items like lavender castile soap, body scrub, body butter, and a candle. My tip here is to think about the bride. Is her style extravagant or more minimal? Does she have a separate bridal registry? In the end, other people still gifted items from the registry so my first plan would have worked out. But now I know to prepare in advance.

What to Wish

Most events have a guestbook or frame for you to sign. At a bridal shower or wedding, you may get the opportunity to leave more than a simple “congratulations.” Prepare your words! You never want to be caught off-guard if you’re asked to make a statement for a video or to sign a book. The last thing you want to do is hold up the line thinking of what to say. Depending on how well you know the couple will determine what you should wish. Something as simple as “Wishing you a lifetime of love and happiness” is quick, simple and sweet!

Remember, a wedding is the start of a new journey for the couple. Whether you go simple or more thoughtful being apart of the moment is what matters most! Have any bridal shower tips? Leave them in a comment below.

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Hey Sis! Packing Social Recap

Erin — Wed, 11 Jul 2018 12:00:33 +0000

One thing that I’ve always enjoyed doing is volunteering and giving back. Since elementary school, I’ve participated in activities that taught me the importance of helping your community. I’ve been considering starting a non-profit organization for a while now but there are a lot of steps to take in the meantime. So my business partner and I decided to start off by hosting small social events that focus on philanthropy.

This weekend, we hosted our first event titled “Hey Sis!: Women Empowerment + Packing Social.” Packing socials are events where a group of people get together to pack items to donate. The bags we packed were given to Goodie Girl Bags, a non-profit organization who delivers them to homeless shelter throughout the DMV. Each bag includes 1 bra, feminine hygiene products like pads & tampons, breast cancer exam cards, and a hand written note for encouragement. In planning our event, we set a goal to pack 150 bags. Little did we know that we set the vision a little too small as we collected over 80 bras before the event.

Both of us have a passion for helping other women so it was important for this event to embody that. Not only in the items we packed for the homeless but by making sure we spoke to the women in the room too. The 2 of us shared a bit of our backgrounds along with one other woman. All with the theme that everyone struggles but it matters how you push past it. Our hope is that we continue to inspire and improve the lives of those around us. Whether it is through a non-profit our hosting other social events like this one. Either way, we know we can make a difference.

Each attendee left the event with a bag of items from our sponsors. We were also able to supply desserts and drinks during the event. My business partner and I are extremely grateful to each and every person who saw our vision and made it come true.

We would like to give a special thanks to all of our sponsors:

Ardell Beauty
Eden BodyWorks
Essentia Water
Jamaican Mango & Lime
This Is L.
OhMazing Food
LiquidJoy Beverages
Sweet Sticky Thing Bakery
Blessed Vessels
Faye Smith Realtor

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My Ectopic Pregnancy Story

Erin — Sat, 26 May 2018 12:00:58 +0000

I’ve always said I wanted to have all of my kids before the age of 30. For multiple reasons; being younger and more active, less complications, building a family and career. But little did I know, at the age of 25, I would find myself having a miscarriage; an ectopic pregnancy. No prior health problems. No prior pregnancies. And on the first try, I lost what I never knew I needed. And I can’t really say it was a try because we weren’t trying to have a baby. It just kinda happened but that doesn’t make it hurt any less. I became the 1 in 4 women who experience a miscarriage.

It was the week of my first doctor’s appointment. We went in thinking that we would find out more; a better timeline than what the blood test had given. But when blood was found in my cervix, things took a turn for the worst. They said I was having a “threatened miscarriage.” Meaning it’s not confirmed but that’s what it seems like. I became more nervous and anxiety took over my body. I had dreams the previous week about miscarrying but I just wrote it off as being worried. And now the thought of it becoming a reality brought tears to my eyes. The next afternoon we went for an emergency sonogram. From looking at the monitor, I could already tell what the nurse saw. My baby was stuck in my fallopian tube; I was having an ectopic pregnancy.

They told me to go straight to the hospital. A same day emergency surgery to was needed to ensure nothing would rupture or be damaged. I remember getting in the car and all I wanted to do was cry. I wanted to curl up in a ball and pretend this wasn’t happening. Mentally, I could not wrap my mind around the fact that I was loosing my baby. Just like that. Nothing could be done to fix this. I literally sat in the waiting room completely numb to what was going on. Every so often I would cry and a nurse would tell me everything is going to be okay. But it definitely didn’t feel like it.

The days following the surgery I spent at home. Not ready to leave the house. Barely wanting to leave my bed. In certain moments, I felt the need to be nestled up under my boyfriend for a sense of strength and protection. In others, I felt like I need to be strong for the both of us because I know he had emotions he didn’t want to share. My body literally felt like it was run over from the pain of the surgery and my heart felt, and still feels, like it’s been yanked out of my chest. At one point, I deleted all my social media apps because seeing kids or pregnant women made me cry. And it seemed like my FBI agent was torturing me because every ad I saw was something for babies or pregnant women. I deleted the pregnancy app off of my phone and couldn’t bring myself to save the pictures. People around me constantly asking how are you. And I constantly said I’m okay when in actuality I was more broken than I think I’ve ever been. I didn’t want to tell them that because I didn’t feel like they would understand. How can you feel this empty? Like you’re missing something you never got to know? In some moments, I felt like I was expected to get up and get over it. At other times, I reached for my belly wishing to feel pregnant again. And yet every time I did I was left with disappointment.

Talking to people was another reason I didn’t want to leave my room. I was trying to find the space between people who were concerned and people who I felt wanted me to just push past things. This was the hardest thing I’ve had to deal with emotionally and I couldn’t find someone who I felt got it. People who have been through miscarriages were telling me everything would be okay. I even looked into a Facebook support group but it was very depressing. I did not know where to find middle ground. And the things people say? Tons of stuff you don’t want to hear after a miscarriage like:

“At least you weren’t that far along.”

“Were you trying to get pregnant?”

“I thought you weren’t ready for kids.”

And I wasn’t that far along, trying, or maybe even “ready” for a child. But that doesn’t stop me from being excited for the experience, in love with knowing that it was coming or sad for my loss. Even being asked “Are you a mom?” around Mother’s Day was a hard pill to swallow. Do I say yes or no?

The first time I looked at my scars I cried. I cried because it will forever be a memory of what I lost. I have moments where I think to myself I must get pregnant again to fill this void. Replace this emptiness in my chest. And yet the thought of losing another life scares me half to death. Then I go through the cycle of what did I do to deserve this? And the thoughts start flooding. From the moment I found out I was pregnant I took care of my body. No alcohol. No smoking. Took my pre-natals. Ate breakfast even when I wasn’t hungry. So what did I do to cause this? What do you do in a time like this? I just wanted things to go back to how they were. Like I was living in a bad dream but it was my reality.

I carried my seed for 8 weeks. 4 of which I knew it was there. That’s a month of loving something you can’t see unconditionally. A month of talking to it. Nurturing it. Figuring out what WE wanted for lunch. Calling it “lil peanut” or “lil blueberry” based on the size depicted in the pregnancy app. I prayed for it. I imagined what my maternity shoot would be like. What we would name him or her. Cried every time someone said what if it’s twins. Pretty much had our life planned out. And now it’s gone and moving on is harder than expected.

Everyone knows I have a love for makeup. But it was probably a week after the surgery that I actually put on makeup again. I couldn’t do a full face. Just foundation. It made me feel a little more like myself. It hid the bags from days of crying and brung a little more life to my outward appearance. I also left the house for the second time that same week. Although the first time probably doesn’t count since all I did was go for a drive. I had to wait until it got dark outside because the thought of seeing people gave me anxiety. And the craziest part…..I drove to work. The place I didn’t want to go back to. The place I hated even before I found out I was pregnant. But I guess I needed something to feel normal. This time, my love was forcing me to leave and wouldn’t say where we we’re going. Something he’s famous for. And with all honestly once I got dressed, I didn’t want go. Anxiety hit me once again. But I knew he wasn’t having that so there was no point in me even saying I no longer wanted to go. Once we got to the restaurant it felt like old times. And that’s when I started to feel better. The 2 of us enjoying each other’s company. Eating food like we love to do. No cares in the world. I started to feel lighter. Like I wasn’t carrying as much baggage. And though we lost the seed we both wanted, I knew we would be okay. I knew we would have another opportunity to be parents. We spent the rest of the night watching tv, laughing, and nibbling on snacks. And for the first time in days things felt somewhat normal again.

2 days later, I was crying again. Not a long ugly cry. Just a few tears shed. Because as I listened to the words in Lauryn Hill’s “Zion” in the middle of Sally’s, it reminded me how happy I was to be pregnant….and also how quickly that feeling left. I got to a point where I wanted to talk to someone about it but I didn’t think anyone would get it. People around me seemed to take it so lightly. They don’t want me to be depressed so they change the subject forcing me to hold it in. I also had to deal with the people who didn’t know. Asking when I’ll have kids or implying that it was time. But my body didn’t feel the same way.

A few months later and I still don’t feel like I’m back to myself. And honestly I don’t know if I’ll ever be. This loss changed me. Changed my perspective on a lot of things. Slowly but surely things are starting to turn around but this is still in the back of my mind. Some days I’m anti-social and don’t want to be bothered. I avoid places or events where there will be a lot of babies or children. And on other days I find myself trying to laugh and make peace with the situation. I’ve had weeks where I cried everyday. I’ve had weeks where I don’t cry at all. It’s a healing process and you have to be in touch with your emotions in order to heal.

Sharing this is also a part of my healing journey. 1 in 4 women experience miscarriage, ectopic pregnancies and stillbirths included. Before it happened to me, I didn’t know how many other women were effected. Especially young women like me. Yea, I’ve heard women say they’ve had a miscarriage but it doesn’t have the same impact. It’s not something that we talk about until it happens to someone we know.

So many women in my circle had gone through similar experiences and I either didn’t know or couldn’t understand the severity. So in sharing this, I hope more women feel comfortable enough to tell their stories and that we create a support system because we’re not alone. If you’re dealing with a loss or have dealt with a loss please reach out to me. Let’s start the conversation.

XOXO,

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Why I Decided to See a Therapist

Erin — Sat, 26 May 2018 12:00:45 +0000

May is mental health awareness month so I figured what better way to celebrate than by telling my own story. Often times, mental health carries a very negative connotation, especially in the Black community. Many of our parents/grandparents will suggest that depression isn’t real. Or that we can “pray away” the issues we’re dealing with. And while prayer and church can definitely be a part of the healing process, they aren’t the only part. Seeing a therapist has a lot of benefits.

I started seeing a therapist towards the end of March after struggling with a pregnancy loss. On the outside, you couldn’t tell that I was still struggling most days. I was back into my normal routine and trying to leave the house with a smile daily. But I also found myself crying everyday. Sometimes several times a day. Things happened so fast and I didn’t know what to do but fake it til I made it. I knew I was taking on too much emotionally but I couldn’t even bring myself search for a therapist. No matter how much I knew I needed it. Life kept moving and so did I.

While I was at the Brave Summit, I heard a lot about mental health and why it was important. Things I already knew but had yet to apply to myself. I was so used to giving other people advice and helping them work through their problems that I couldn’t see the need to take my own advice. And still, at a time when I needed support, I felt myself still giving the small bit of energy I had to others. But when Amanda Seales said “Therapy is like a gym membership for your brain” it sparked something in me.

“Erin, how can you preach about better for everyone else but not seek it for yourself?”

While talking to a few girls at BRAVE I learned (or was reminded) about therapyforblackgirls.com, an online directory to help Black women find Black therapists. I knew this was my sign to stop BSing and get the help I needed. Truthfully, I wasn’t ashamed or discouraged about getting help. I just didn’t know where to find it and how comfortable I would be with the person I found. When it comes to doctors and specialist, I am very picky in what I am looking for. I like to have Black, female doctors because they can understand me as a young Black woman. So when looking for a therapist, I wanted a younger Black woman; someone who mirrored me. I felt she would relate to me better. Through the website, I was able to find therapists in my area and review their profiles in one place before making a selection.

Searching for a doctor or therapist can be a stressful process. Therapy For Black Girls took away a lot of the anxiety in the process. The first meeting with my therapist, I cried as soon as I sat down. There was so much weight I was carrying and so much I couldn’t wait to get off of my chest. Of course she couldn’t help me work through all of my problems in one meeting. But I literally felt lighter when I left. I was able to unload some of the things that I had bottled up. I also discovered a few things that I didn’t realize were bothering me.

Benefits of Seeking Mental Healthcare

Before I decided to see a therapist I did try talking to people in my circle. But I couldn’t find the balance between people who acted like nothing happened and those who treated me like I was an inch away from being sent to the nearest psych ward. It was honestly a relief to speak to someone who was outside of my situation and without judgement. Although I was speaking to a mental health professional, I felt very comfortable. I didn’t feel “crazy” or like I was on the edge of self-destruction. I was able to have someone listen to me as I talk and give advice that was valuable. Even though I feel I have a better handle on things now, I’ve still been seeing her consistently because I know healing doesn’t happen overnight. And truthfully, it is an eye opening process.

Mental health is something that we tend to ignore. But we should all take it more seriously. Depression and anxiety are real things that effect us daily. If you run from them you could start to suffer from long term effects like stress and heart attacks. I encourage everyone to see a licensed therapist. Whether you’re dealing with a tramautic event, stressed with work, or looking to learn more about self care. Mental health care should not be a negative thing.

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BRAVE Summit with Amanda Seales

Erin — Wed, 04 Apr 2018 12:30:51 +0000

One thing you will hear me say it over and over again: Never stop learning! At a recent blogger meet-up I learned about a summit at Georgetown titled B.R.A.V.E.

Black
Resilient
Artisitic
Vigilent
Enough

BRAVE is an annual event that was started 3 years ago by black women at Georgetown. The event seeks to “honor the eclectic narrative of Black women/femmes” by “combating the pervasive media coverage and replacing it with the truth.” Just by the title I knew this would be an event for me. I was even more sold when I found out that Amanda Seales, from Insecure on HBO, would be the keynote speaker. What I will say is that I did expect the event to be full of empowered women empowering women. What I did not expect was to leave feeling inspired and overwhelmed by the joy in the room.

The first panel featured Erika Totten, a spiritual life coach, and Deshauna Barber, Miss USA 2016. They spoke about Black Girl Joy and what it truly means when you tap into your magic. One of the key gems that I took away was about self-love.

“You have to learn to break the chains of what people have told you. Only then will you truly love and know yourself.” – Erika Totten, To Live Unchained

Deshauna told us how she felt the need to wear wigs during the Miss USA pageant. But she reflected by saying that embracing her natural hair opened the door for

another black woman with natural hair from DC to win Miss USA the following year. My favorite part of this panel was Erika encouraging us all to get up and twerk! She said twerking 10 minutes a day helps open your root chakra and I can’t argue with that!

After the opening panel, we split into breakout sessions. The first one I attended was “Black Women in Public Relations.” I am currently studying for my Master’s in PR so it’s a perfect fit. The ladies on the panel stressed how important it is to determine what you want your image to be.

“Be authentic to who you are.” – Brittany Carter, B. Carter Solutions

Lunch was catered by Florida Avenue Grill, the oldest soul food spot in the world. And it did not disappoint. I’m talking fried chicken, greens, mac & cheese, yams. They even had a vegan option for those with dietary restrictions. For dessert, there was a variety of cake jars provided by Cakelove.

The next breakout session I went to was “Black Women in Media/Entertainment.” This one definitely wasn’t what I expected but I definitely got a lot of useful information. It featured music producer Trakgirl, talent manager Paris Cole, and actress Candice Macfarlane. These ladies talked about having confidence in yourself and your brand. As women in a male dominated field, they stressed the importance of knowing all the roles of your team. And they mentioned my favorite phrase, “never stop learning.” One of the biggest takeaways was that you don’t have to feel like you have it all together.

“Remember everybody is a mess. Every moment is meant for you. Just align yourself.” – @Paris_Cole

The last panel was all about developing your career. Shelby Hall, of Under Armour, and Ericka Pittman, of Combs Enterprises, spoke on making your passion work for you. They said their biggest advice for young professionals is to send “Thank You” cards because it makes you stand out. They also expressed that you have to take your time to get where you want to be in life. Ericka has had 7 jobs in the 9 years that she has worked with Diddy. But it took her 22 years to get to where she is. She is now the Chief Marketing Officer at Aquahydrate, one of Diddy’s brands.

“One thing that Diddy told me is ‘You don’t always have to be the smartest person in the room. Sometimes you just have to shut the f*ck up.'” – Ericka Pittman, Combs Ent.

Of course the day ran long but I couldn’t leave without seeing Amanda Seales. Her Instagram stories are filled with great gems about black culture and feminism. In speaking with us, she was very clear that black women run shit. But she also said that there has to be an effort to build each other up because too often we consider constructive criticism a drag. Amanda expressed the need for people of color to create our own spaces and not just our own content. She also spoke a lot about mental health saying that therapy is like a gym membership for your brain. Her information was insightful and relatable. She also kept the crowd laughing.

“If you’re trying to find a wife, come to an Amanda Seales show. There’s women with degrees and regular pap smears. The Dashiki chic!” – Amanda Seales

Amanda will be back in DC on July 21 with “Smart, Funny, & Black” at the Kennedy Center. I also suggest keep up with BRAVE! Although the event was pretty long, the information was well worth it!

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Traveling Across the Border to Canada

Erin — Sun, 25 Mar 2018 09:00:02 +0000

Traveling is one of the ways I like to clear my mind. And when you have a passport the possibilities are endless! A friend of mine decided she wanted to go Canada for her birthday. Even though Canada is a hop, skip, and a jump away you still need a passport to cross the border.

To our surprise, the drive from Maryland was only about 8 hours and we only paid one toll. Driving up the mountainside of Buffalo was definitely much easier than driving through New York City traffic. But there were a lot less sights to see. Crossing the border and stopping at the Duty-Free shops were the highlight of the ride. We also had a short drive through what I like to call “Porn Town,” one of those areas with “Adult Movies Here” signs everywhere. But we listened to music and audio-books along the way to keep ourselves entertained.

We decided to stay in Niagara Falls for a night before heading to Toronto. The room we picked at Marriott on The Falls had an amazing view of the water. If you’re looking to stay in Niagara, this is definitely a hotel I would recommend. It was very nice to be in the middle of all the activity. There is a casino, restaurants like Margaritaville, and an amusement park all within a 5-10 minute drive. The room was very clean, beds were comfortable, and the bathroom was very modern. We had difficulty figuring out how to get down to the falls because we didn’t ask. But it’s close enough to take an inexpensive cab ride or maybe even walk when it isn’t too cold out.

We used a Groupon to have dinner at the Skylon Revolving Tower, a 775-foot dining experience that I will never forget! The food was great and seeing the falls from above at night was breathtaking.

Before heading to Toronto, we decided to get up close and personal with the falls. Seeing the view from our hotel window versus seeing it in person was a very different experience. The sound of the rushing water was very similar to being on the beach. But being that it was the beginning of March it was very cold so close to the water.

The drive from Niagara Falls to Toronto was only about 2 hours but of course we had to stop at the outlets! And we were so glad we did. I got 2 pair of Uggs for $200 Canadian which translates to $150 USD! Talk about a come up. We picked an AirBnB in Downtown Toronto and it was definitely an experience. This was the first time I’ve ever stayed in an AirBnB and I’ve always seen how nice they are. Don’t get me wrong, the home was nice and clean. But the description neglected to say that we were staying above a block of corner stores. Nonetheless, we didn’t run into many problems besides the loud city life at night.

We picked a lot of the places we ate it by looking at Yelp reviews. Many of them were very small, intimate diners but the food did not disappoint! My favorite meals were a breakfast burrito from Easy Restaurant and a la carte tacos from Grand Electric in Downtown Toronto. I found a food festival by searching Instagram and we were able to see people making ice sculptures and try maple taffy (it was gross). We also stumbled upon a dispensary while we were exploring the city. It was much different from the one I visited in Vegas. Very “hole-in-the-wall chic.”

Our last adventure was up to the CN Tower. For the price you pay it was pretty underwhelming if I’m being honest. The building is currently under construction so you can’t see the main observation room. They offer the option to substitute the main room with the higher Skypod, however, there was a 2-hour wait and there isn’t much to do inside the building to waste time. The construction also takes away from the glass floor exhibit because the walls are all boarded up.

The biggest thing that we didn’t expect is that most businesses do not take American check/credit cards. If you are able to swipe your card, you may be charged an International transaction fee. In non-tourist areas your best bet is to have cash on hand (American and Canadian bills were accepted everywhere we went).

Even though it was cold we had a great time. We were more into exploring than partying so I couldn’t tell you about the nightlife. But if you’re into adventure then I definitely suggest Canada!

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It’s Okay to be Single

Erin — Wed, 14 Feb 2018 09:30:07 +0000

Being in your 20s is one of the most awkward stages of adulthood. You may have completed college, be living on your own, or starting a career. It’s like you’re supposed to have it all together and yet you’re still trying to figure it all out. It’s a time when you are truly learning how to be independent. The one question you get tired of hearing, “Are you dating someone yet?” *inserts major side eye*

I spent majority of my time in college in a committed, long distance relationship. Once we broke up, I decided to spend time focusing on myself. I was in no rush to date someone else because I had been with that person since I was 16. I didn’t realize that being single for 3 years was something that people would notice and constantly point out. It was like once I graduated, I was expected to date and get married right away. And the older I got, the more family and friends would start to ask questions.

“When are you going to find a boyfriend?”
“Are you talking to someone yet?”
“Are you gay?”

At one point, someone even told me that since I hadn’t found someone in college I was more likely to not get married. I tried to keep from falling into the trap but I started to wonder too. Why haven’t I found someone? Will I get married? If not, will I ever be truly happy alone? But that’s when I remembered I was single by choice! And it is no one’s choice but mine whether I decide to date or not.

It’s Okay to be Single

One of the things I had to realize was that it is okay to be single. Being alone is the best way to learn how to love yourself. Not to say that I treated myself badly or didn’t love myself at all. But I started to realize that I lost myself in my past relationship. I spent a lot of time thinking about what “WE” wanted or what would be best for “US” without putting myself first. You are still young in your 20s. You’re still learning about yourself. What you like and don’t like. What it means to be independent. Searching for your purpose in life. All of this is a lot so adding another person into the mix can be stressful! Not saying that it’s impossible to handle but it is definitely a growing pain to go through. Not to mention I actually was dating. I just hadn’t found someone who I deemed worthy enough to meet my family yet. As I got older, I had less time for people to waste and there’s no point in introducing someone when you have no idea where it’s going. And that’s okay too.

Stand Confident in Your Singleness

One of the biggest things that helped me combat everyone’s comments was being confident in myself. When you spend time second guessing your choices you start to question more than just why you’re single. Another thing that helped was understanding what standards I had set for myself and why I set them. When it comes to setting standards, everyone may not always agree with your reasoning or find them feasible. But as long as they work REALISTICALLY for you, who can tell you otherwise? Last but not least……I stopped looking! Once you stop focusing on being single and start loving yourself you will flourish and feel amazing. My hair started growing, I started losing weight and my skin was clearing up. I can’t say my booty got bigger because well….it didn’t. #LilBootiesMatter

Now here I am, 5 years after the break up, in a happy relationship. My friends love him. We have fun together. And most importantly, we aren’t worried what others think. Be patient and I’m sure the same will happen for you, if it hasn’t already.

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I Sold Sex Toys in College

Erin — Wed, 31 Jan 2018 12:00:54 +0000

What can I say about college? Some of the best times in my life so far. But also some of the craziest experiences. College can also be expensive while also making it hard to maintain a job; which is how I ended up selling sex toys.

During my junior year of college, I started working seasonally as a photographer for a department store. I was under the impression that the manager was going to keep me on as a part-time associate. But then I noticed I was no longer on the schedule. Which meant it was time to find something else to do. But what?

Being let go without actually being told you are being let go leaves a lot of things up to chance. School was starting back up pretty soon and stores were losing the hours they had gained during the holiday season. But I needed a job which meant it was time to get creative. I knew about companies like Avon and MaryKay but I couldn’t see myself doing that. I needed something fast. Something that would interest college students. Something that would be easy to sell.

How it Went Down (no pun intended)

I was browsing a Facebook Group for my school when I came across a post from a girl who was looking for other girls to join her sales team. I don’t know how I knew it was sex toys right away–maybe it was the wording. She was only looking for girls, it’s in sales……had to be sex toys right? I sent her a message expressing my interest and she was excited to bring me on the team.

I honestly don’t know why I thought I was cut out for the job because I tend to be an introvert. But it was something to do. Something different and had the promise to bring in a lot of money. The ladies on my team were extremely nice and had receipts to show how much money they were bringing in. This was a multi-million dollar team. I needed a piece of that! Show me the way ladies. I was all in.

I started searching for customers by asking a few of my friends if they would come to or host a sex toy party. Pretty much everyone said “Hell yea!” They were so excited which gave me the confidence to put myself out there with this new business venture.

To get started, I had to purchase a kit with all of the essentials for beginners; products, catalogs, order forms. Then I started learning about the products and attending parties hosted by my upline to get a feel of things. Looking at some of the products made me super nervous! They offer everything from lotions and books to lube and some of the weirdest looking toys I had ever seen. And the prices? Whew! I had not realized yet that this was a lifestyle for some people. But my team was confident in my ability to sell and so was I.

Related: I Purchased Tickets To A Burlesque Show On Groupon

While I was confident in selling, I was not comfortable letting everyone know what my new job was. Blasting “Come buy sex toys from me!” on the internet is not ideal for an introvert. Plus people are very judgmental and hold onto stigmas when it comes to sex. But of course, the biggest way to gain customers is through word of mouth so I had to figure something out. I decided to set up my kit in my living room and invite some friends over to get some practice on selling. We had such a great time and I felt so comfortable explaining products so I just knew this was going to go great for me.

That was short-lived. The biggest problem I ran into was remaining active with the company. You had to sell X amount of dollars in products in X amount of months. And I tried my hardest to remain active and keep bringing in customers. I bought samples to hand out. Came up with cute ideas. Got the word out to a few people I knew around campus. But I still wasn’t making enough to remain active AND still make a profit.

Why I stopped

Although almost everyone is open and willing to talk about their sex life in college, it was difficult to get customers. The one thing about trying to sell something as a college student is that everybody is just as broke as you. They are also just as busy as you. Something I wish I would have thought about when signing up. I met plenty of people who said they were going to purchase things or throw a party and it never worked out. And I never wanted to be down someone’s throat about placing an order or throwing a party. I felt like that would be like saying, “I know your sex life really sucks so come shop with me!”

Between random sales and the few parties I did have, I was able to remain active for a while. But I found myself using the money that was supposed to be my profit to purchase extra items to meet the requirements. Within the year I decided to call it quits. I had picked up a part-time job because I needed a steady income (sis had bills). The job mixed with school and having a social life left no time to dedicate to selling (or begging). And of course, as soon as I went inactive people started asking me, “Hey, do you still have that business?” Girl–where were you months ago?!

If you asked me would I sell sex toys again I’d tell you yes! No question. I think the greatest thing about my team was that we were very big on teaching women to feel beautiful and confident in their sexuality. I had so much fun working for the company and I met some great women. I even reached out to one of them to host a party a few years after I stopped selling. I’ve also learned to be a lot more comfortable talking about sex and pleasure as I’ve gotten older. It’s nothing to be ashamed of!

The only thing that would keep me away is the structure of the company. I just don’t think the idea of a Multi-Level Marketing company is as enticing as it once was. But with a quick Google search, I’m sure you can start your own company.

The post I Sold Sex Toys in College appeared first on Running Erins.

2017 Travel Round Up

Erin — Thu, 04 Jan 2018 10:00:47 +0000

Oh the places you will go! And trust me, in 2017 I went and kept going. In the month of July alone I spent 3 weekends away from home and loved every minute of it! Travel is one way I keep myself rejuvenated and happy. It gives me the chance to escape stress, clear my mind, and experience new things.

If you don’t travel often I encourage you to do so in 2018. There are plenty of opportunities for you to travel if you search for them. And trust me, I’m quick to find a reason to get up and go! Trips for work, birthdays and even to reunite with friends and family. Going by plane, car or even train. To places I’ve been before and places I’ve never seen. As 2017 comes to an end, I thought it may be nice to do a round up of the places I went this year. Hopefully, it will encourage you to visit somewhere new or revisit an old favorite in 2018.

Related: How to Prepare for a Road Trip

South Beach, Miami

Starting your year off with a trip is very refreshing! You get to unwind after the holidays and escape the cold if you’re headed somewhere warm. For my best friend’s birthday in January, we went down to Miami for a girl’s trip. I’ve been to Florida plenty of times but always with family and never with friends so I was super excited about this trip. My favorite part: the food! We ate at somewhere different everyday and there was nothing that I didn’t like. I tried Thai food for the first time, munched on some conch fritters, and went to The Sugar Factory. We explored the beach, went shopping, and partied it up at our hotel’s hookah bar. Miami is always a great quick getaway when you just need some fun in the sun.

Related: Exploring South Beach

Brooklyn, New York

Where Brooklyn at?! *inserts Milly Rock* While Miami might be a quick plane ride away….New York is a short drive from DC. It’s also one of my favorite places to visit. There is so much to do and so much to see. There are so many events and pop-ups that happen in the city that you’re bond to experience something new. This trip to New York was for Curlfest, an annual natural beauty festival. Curlies and Naturalistas alike come from all over to show up and show out! There’s nothing like being around people who have the same interest as you. From the hairstyles to the freebies, it was definitely a great time! The trip was very quick but still fun nonetheless. Quick trips are the best when you need to clear your mind.

Disney World, Florida

The big kid in me has always loved Disney World. So when I got the chance to go this year with my boyfriend + his family I definitely couldn’t pass it up. I was in high school the last time I went and this time I was pushing 25 but the excitement was still the same. The drive down to Florida was the most intense part. Almost 24 hours in the car because we stopped to visit family along the way but it was definitely worth it. I was grateful that my boyfriend and I chose to fly back though (don’t think I would have survived more time in the car). Disney is one of those places where they have something for everyone. From the adults to the kiddos. The Pandora World of Avatar was my favorite part of all the parks. The lines for it were long of course but so were all the other lines. I definitely recommend planning your days out in advance though. 1 park can take up your whole day so we didn’t even get a chance to hit the pool.

Mall of America, Minnesota

The one great thing about having a full-time job: paid travel! In July, I also got to head to the University of Minnesota for a work conference. I won’t lie….when I originally found out where we were going I WAS NOT excited. What’s in Minnesota? Why not California? But then it hit me that I could visit the largest mall in the US. And the one thing I love besides food is shopping! The only downside about work trips is you have to schedule everything around your schedule. And with an intense conference schedule I was able to visit Mall of America twice but only on short time periods so I didn’t get to see all of it. But it was definitely everything I imagined. All of my favorite stores + some I have never heard of. An amusement park + aquarium if you aren’t really into shopping (pshhh). And a bunch of restaurants. Minnesota definitely wasn’t what I expected. It was pretty cold for July *inserts Lil Yatchy lyrics.* And the transit system is definitely nothing like the one in DC. But I enjoyed myself.

Made in America, Philly

Up until recently I was not a fan of big festivals because of crowds. It all goes back to when I was in college and Chris Brown came to the local mall. Talk about hundreds of screaming girls! It just made me uneasy and uncomfortable so I’ve avoided crowds at all costs. But I could not pass up the chance to go to Made in America, Jay-Z 2-day music festival. It’s held the first weekend in September which is my birthday month; even more reason for me to go! And I’m definitely glad I went. The girls and I had so much fun eating cheesesteaks, having Henny for Breakfast, and people watching at Fat Tuesday’s. Not to mention the lineup was pretty good; it included Cardi B, Migos, 21Savage, J.Cole and Jay-Z himself. We also booked our hotel before tickets even dropped so we were able to stay walking distance from the venue.

Las Vegas, Nevada

If you checked out my post about my trip to Nevada you know I wasn’t there to gamble and party. I actually went for a baby shower. And while the reason was unconventional, I still got to do some of the things Vegas is known for. I won’t say much about this trip in case you have already read about it. But I will say it was a great close out to 2017.

Have you planned any trips for 2018? Let me know in the comments!

The post 2017 Travel Round Up appeared first on Running Erins.

Goal Setting & Action Planning for the New Year

Erin — Wed, 20 Dec 2017 12:00:17 +0000

2018 is around the corner. Which is slightly unbelievable because 2017 flew by! It’s that time of year where everyone starts stressing over resolutions, vision boards, and goals for the new year.

An article from Forbes states that about 40% of Americans make New Year’s Resolutions but only about 8% of us achieve them. One of the biggest reasons people don’t complete their resolutions is because they set goals that are wide and unfocused. A new year is a great time to set new goals. But for 2018, let’s set SMART goals and achieve them through action planning.

What is a SMART Goal?

SMART goals can help you focus and be productive when it comes to reaching them. You should not be setting goals that are unrealistic for your lifestyle. For example, saying you want to be CEO of a company with no prior experience. It’s also great if you can keep track of your progress with your goals throughout the year.

Action Planning

Creating an action plan can help you reach your goals faster. An action plan lists out the steps it would take for you to meet those goals. It helps you maintain a timeline to stay on track and keeps the goal in the front of your mind. Vision boards can be a great addition to action planning and goal setting. They help you visualize what achieving your goals would be like. They can also be a daily reminder of your goals depending on where you put it.

One last tip for reaching your New Years Resolution: start now! Find ways to enjoy the changes you are making. If you wish to eat healthier, use Pinterest to plan meals. If you plan to save money, look into apps like Acorn or books by authors like Dave Ramsey. The only thing in the way of your goals is you!

Are you setting a New Years Resolution or goals for 2018? Let me know what they are in the comments!

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